Opening up to Love

Does it feel ‘hard’ to find a relationship?

Are relationships something that just don’t happen for you?

Or maybe you are stuck in self sabotage mode and can’t get past that?

Under the surface of this will be beliefs about yourself maybe as ‘unloveable’ or ‘unworthy’, or associations between love with pain, or fear of being controlled in a relationship due to past experiences, whether this comes from your own experience or seeing a parent controlled or miserable. Or maybe there were experiences at school where you felt humiliated.

These things usually start at a young age. Then protective behaviours are developed such as ‘I’ll keep him at a distance until I know he really cares’ or ‘I’ll push her away before she finds out I am not good enough and hurts me’. These protective behaviours reinforce the original experiences and layers of pain and sabotaging behaviours build up, as well as ever wider negative beliefs around yourself and relationships.

You end up in this dichotomy of hugely wanting a relationship whilst all your behaviours and internal body responses are repelling it.

The work that we will do isolates all beliefs and experiences that have caused this situation. Once identified, we can get rid of the beliefs and the emotional charge behind them, quickly and painlessly using MAP and any other tools that come up as being important for you.

We then work on the behavioural patterns which will be at play, so that you can shift to behaviours which reflect your true value. Examples of these behaviours might be:

  • if someone shows interest in you, you look the other way or you get away as quickly as possible,

  • maybe you make relationships all about the other person to ‘please’ them,

  • maybe you try and control all sorts of external elements to feel safe – checking their location, their phone etc

Then we do some visioning work, so that you are able to feel alive in all your senses of how it would be to be in this great relationship, where you are completely relaxed and yourself.

By the end of the process you:

  • have a heart which is wide open to relationships,

  • believe in yourself and that you deserve a great relationship,

  • feel open and trusting knowing that it will come when the time is right,

  • your relationship behaviours come from a place of respecting and valuing yourself and knowing that you will assert yourself and express your needs appropriately, thus creating an equal and balanced partnership.

And the beauty of going through this process is that as all of the above takes shape, clients come out of it living their best life and full of joy. From that place, the most amazing relationships are born.

I can’t tell you how happy it makes me when I see clients attracting incredible relationships after struggling for years in this area.

 

Contact Me

Kate Mayor

Kate@ankyrahealing.com

07817 529269